Jessica's Top 250 Worst Songs Of All-Time 2011!

[JessiePie]

40. Beyondsh1t - Run The Flops (Me) (2011)
I'm sorry but Abel's nickname for her is hilarious. Anyway, honestly, ever since "Deja Vu" and the B-Day album, I have felt like the quality of Beyonce's music, for the most part, has gone downhill. I even heard she released a song in 2009 called "Diva" that I've never heard but supposedly it's a total mess. However, I very highly doubt that song is as big of a mess as this. Lyrically it's not bad because let's face it, girls DO run the world. But the song itself is awful. Never have I seen Beyonce' flop as hard as this song. Either she needs to start making smashes like "Crazy In Love" again, or she needs to hang it up.

39. "INXS" featuring J.D. Whoretune - Ugly Vegas (2005)
Actual title is "Pretty Vegas", since, of course, "Ugly Vegas" was the name of my #1 smash from Spring 2006 which parodies this shitty excuse for a song. I still remember that morning in August 2005 when I first heard this. This was before I started listening to AT40 Flashback, and honestly, before then I was a dumbass when it came to 80's music. But I have heard INXS's 1988 classic, "Need You Tonight" on the radio before and I always really liked it. I knew they had a reality show in 2005 called Rock Star: INXS at the time, but I never watched it and didn't know what the purpose of the show was. I also didn't know that original frontman Michael Hutchence died in 1997. So when I first heard this song, I thought I was going to hear "Need You Tonight"-like vocals. Boy was I in for a surprise. When the song first began I was like, "Hmmm okay. Not really sure what to think of this so far." But by the time the chorus started with talentless tool J.D Fortune shouting, "IT AIN'T PRETTY!!!11 AFTER THE SHOW!!!11" I had no choice but to shut it off. My poor ears were terribly tortured and abused! I thought if I ever heard this song on the radio I would have to throw my stereo out the window. J.D Fortune is, in my opinion, the third worst male vocalist ever after Prince and Lil' Wayne. The only good thing to come out of this song was, as I mentioned earlier, my SMASH hit single, the anthem of Spring 2006, the song that reached #1 in every single country, and basically the greatest song of all-time, "Ugly Vegas" by JessieLou. For those who have never heard the legendary track, here is the song. I wrote and recorded it in December 2005 just for fun. I can explain the references to fungus, Josh, Paint, and Justin. They were inside jokes from M4B Charts Central during this time. For the most part, I'm not crazy I swear.



Also, since I mentioned the Rock Star series, I completely forgot to post this hilarious photo during my Rock Star Supernova commentary. This is a photo of Lukas "The Stupid Bastard" Rossi and Tommy Lee kissing! PROVING THAT THE FINALE WAS BIASED.



38. Rebecca Whack - Fry Day (2011)
I don't care how old this girl is, she can't sing and the autotune shit doesn't help her. Her age is no excuse to be such a poor singer. Listen to a then 13 year old JoJo with her 2004 hit single, "Leave (Get Out)", and you will see what I mean. If she was just doing this to be silly like I did with "Ugly Vegas", then I could understand, but the sad thing is, this was actually a serious song! I really don't understand why Katy Perry wants to work with this flop.

37. Jason Mraz - I'm Boring (2009)
I don't absolutely hate this song because of overplay, I hate this song because it is one of the most boring and overrated pieces if shit I have ever heard. How the f**k did this become a hit?! If someone way cooler like Oasis did this song (although they would never stoop that low), it would've flopped. I hated this crap from day one. No, Jason Mraz, you are NOT mine.

36. Khia - My Handcuffs, My Mugshot (Arrest It) (2002)
Actual title is "My Neck, My Back (Lick It)". So apparently this bitch has gotten arrested 20 times, which I find to be rather hilarious. This is another song I have hated from day one. She is not talented at all and the lyrics are basically porn. If I want any kind of musical porn, I will just look at Type O Negative frontman Peter Steele's ridiculously sexy Playgirl photos from 1995. f**k this flop song.

35. Billy Ray Skankrus - Achy Breaky Career (Hence Why I Used My Slutty Daughter To Restart It) (1992)
Although I have always hated this song, I hate it even more now because of Miley. Now we know where she got her lack of talent from.

34. Far East Flopheads - Not Like A G6 (2010)
More stupid crap from the autotune age. NEXT!

33. Akon The Polygamist - (I Am) Lonely (Because Who Would Want Me After Recording A Whiny Song Like This?) (2005)
Only good thing about this song is that it kicked "Amarillo" out of #1 in the U.K., although I actually think this is even worse. The chorus to the song isn't even his! It's the chorus to the original version from Bobby Vinton sped up to sound like a chipmunk. I could've done that through Goldwave!

32. Akon The Polygamist – Belly Dancer (Bananza) (2005)
No, I seriously could not think of a good title for this. The song's title is THAT stupid. Honestly I never got the Indian-ish music in pop or urban music, which could explain why this is his highest song on the list.

31. Jessica Simpson – This Song Was Made For Floppin' (2005)
Remember this album right here?



That is none other than Jessica Simpson's 1999 debut album, Sweet Kisses. I remember getting that album when it first came out for my birthday and I absolutely loved it. I listened to it all day. When I was a kid, I was a huge fan of all four of the pop princesses (Britney, Christina, Jessica, & Mandy). After Britney, Jessica Simpson was my favorite. "I Think I'm In Love With You", "Irresistible", and "With You" are three of my all-time favorite pop songs to come out of the last decade. I always wished that she got the amount of attention and popularity that Britney and Christina had. Then in 2004, Jessica Simpson finally got the popularity that I felt she deserved, although I'm not exactly crazy about how she achieved it - by mistaking Chicken Of The Sea Tuna for chicken on an episode of her MTV reality show Newlyweds with Nick Lachey. Like most people in America during this time, I LOVED Jessica Simpson. I remember her and Nick even had a variety show that lasted I think like an episode or two that I watched with my family. Then, a year later in 2005, her downfall began. She was working on a movie based on the old TV show, The Dukes Of Hazzard. For the movie she released a cover of Nancy Sinatra's "These Boots Are Made For Walkin'". Honestly, I think this is one of those songs that, no matter who sings it, it's just meant to suck. I easily think this is the worst version because it's a huge mess. It's like country meets R&B meets pop and it just doesn't work. However, I think the original sucks too as well as Megadeth's version from 1985 which was just called "These Boots" (and this is coming from a HUGE Megadeth fan!) Of course let's also not forget that she looked like a total whore in the video, but even if she did look good in it, it doesn't matter because at the end of the day this song will always f**king suck to me. She definitely redeemed herself with "A Public Affair" and "I Belong To Me", but it's ashame that she's not taken seriously anymore, although I think she brings it upon herself. I mean, dating John Mayer? Are you KIDDING ME? That douche is still to come by the way. It seems like these days she's just famous for being treated like shit by other guys. It's pretty sad. She does have her own designer line thing though of clothes, handbags, shoes etc. and it's a really good line! I love HER shoes. But anyway, I would love it if Jessica put out another great pure pop album like Sweet Kisses again.

21. Came out in 2009; after "Say" by John Mayer this is the worst ballad I have ever heard from the worst female vocalist I have ever heard.
22. Reggae shit from 2006.
23. Lil' Wayne collaborating with... Jimmy Brooks from Degrassi?!
24. Obscure one hit wonder from late 1984; a white guy with a terrible sounding falsetto voice.
25. Another song from the meth-addicted whore and three other guys! This was from early 2010.
26. Speaking of John Mayer, his first of three appearances on the list! This is one of his earlier, extremely overplayed hits.
27. She's only famous for being one of the biggest whores EVER. I wonder if she's ever hung out with Fergie...
28. Someone who "was forced" to record this song; she's only famous for getting pissed on by Ray J.
29. Childish #1 hit from last year. LET'S GET DANCY!!111
30. Country singer's #1 hit from late 1980; one of the most boring songs... EVER!

[impractiCole]

23. Drake - Miss Me f/ Lil Wayne
25. Fergie - Rock That Body f/ The Black Eyed Peas
26. John Mayer - Your Body Is A Wonderland
28. Kim Kardashian - Jam (Turn It Up)
29. P!nk - Raise Your Glass

[JessiePie]

26, 28, & 29 are correct

[JessiePie]

30. Crappy Rogers - Lady (Is A Geezer, Just Like Me) (1980)
KENNY ROGERS HAS FINALLY MADE THE LIST. The reason why his other crap missed out is because this is the only song of his that is so boring that I actually remember this. This one always stood out as his worst to me. If you want to hear a really boring and geezerly song from the early 80's, this is the song for you. This song is basically the cure for insomnia.

29. Pink – Raise Your Ass (2010)
I first heard this song around the time it went to #1. I read it went to #1 having no idea Pink even had a new single out, so I went on YouTube to listen to this. THIS SONG IS A f**kING MESS! The lyrics sound like something I would've wrote in fifth grade. "Let's just get dancey"? HOW OLD ARE YOU AGAIN?! If it weren't for the Whack Eyed Peas and that whorish skank Fuglie, and Lil' Payne, this would've easily been my least favorite song of 2010. Fortunately she was able to redeem herself with "f**kin' Perfect", but honestly Pink has been hit or miss for me since "Get The Party Started". I'd love for her to do another song along the lines of "Just Like A Pill", but you know what? As long as she doesn't say "let's get dancey" in a song ever again, I'm happy.

28. Kim Karskankian – Jam (Let's Not Turn It Up Because I'm A Stupid Whore Whose Claim To Fame Was Getting Pissed On) (2011)
The only time Kim Kardashian is cool is when she's Amy Marshall on Urapopstar, especially considering that Amy has the greatest PR ever. Anyway this song sucks. This bitch gets on my last nerve. Did you know that around the time Chris Brown got arrested and all the celebrities said what they thought about the Chris/Rihanna situation thinking people actually care what they think, the Kardashian sisters, particularly Kim if I recall, said something along the lines of, "Chris and Rihanna need to talk it out and work things out" - WHAT THE f**k IS THERE TO TALK OUT??? HE f**kING BEAT HER UP!!! Is she really THAT much of a weak ass? Also every time she poses nude for a magazine she whines about it saying "they revealed too much" - Um, you're posing nude, what do you think you're going to be seen as? A nun? And here's the best one - she only posed for Playboy because "her Mom convinced her" and she only recorded this terrible excuse for a song because "The Dream made her", does she seriously have any backbone? She doesn't need to do shit if she doesn't want to. This skank is the EXACT opposite of a strong woman. Her claim to fame was getting pissed on by Ray J like a little whore. MAYBE if she got famous for something else, like her clothing store, there would be a better chance of me liking her (although I can't guarantee it because, again, she's a weak ass), but she got famous by being a whore, therefore, I have absolutely NO respect for her. Now, there's no denying that she's gorgeous, but honestly, who cares when she's such an annoying, whiny prick, and a spoiled brat; and thanks to her listening to The Dream like the pussy that she is, she now has what is in my opinion the 28th worst song of all time. Also, even though even I find her to be pretty, I did find some embarrassing photos of this whore that I would love to share with you guys.

(The 90's are over hun)



This one's my favorite...



27. Paris Filthton – Stars Are Blind (Because They Were Looking At My Ugly Face) (2006)
Wow, would you look at that? MORE WHORES! For those who think I only hate this song because of Paris, I don't mean to sound rude when I say this, but SUCK IT. The truth is, I do hate this song because of Paris, but not because her claim to fame was also by being a whore, but because, simply, she can't sing! Although I didn't really care for the reggae-theme of the song either so even if someone with talent did this song I can't guarantee that I'd like it, but that's besides the point. The point is, this song is pure shit. I remember around the time this album came out, I saw it at Best Buy and I covered it up with a Pearl Jam CD. Also, you know, I fully admitted that I thought Kim Karskankian was pretty, but I can't say the same about this whore. She has pretty hair and her perfume doesn't smell as STD-infested as I thought, but other than that I think she's ugly. Her face is weird, her nose is bigger than Geddy Lee's, and she's a stick. She's a spoiled brat who cries when she doesn't get her way. Also, what I don't understand is why so many rich people, including herself, would spend their money on, of all things, DRUGS! She got arrested like a year ago for cocaine possession. I don't know about you guys but if I had the amount of money Paris Filthton had I wouldn't be on here posting this list right now, I'D BE SHOPPING MY ASS OFF AT VICTORIA'S SECRET! I'm just glad this crackwhore didn't release a follow-up album, and here's hoping it stays that way. By the way, four years later and this is still the greatest photo ever...



26. John Mayer – Your Body Is Not A Wonderland (Because I'm John Mayer And I'm A Douchebag) (2002)
I think the fact that John Mayer has three appearances on this list, and the first one is all the way at #26, further proves how much I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT STAND THIS TOOL'S MUSIC. Now, I don't want to get too much into personal life since I did that with Paris and Kim, but basically I think John Mayer is an egotistical douchebag and I don't like the way he treated Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston. But now let's go back to the music. When "No Such Thing" came out, I had a love/hate relationship with that song. When I first heard it I thought it was okay but then I got sick of it because of overplay. These days if that song comes on I won't be too thrilled since I'd much rather be listening to someone way cooler like Legendary Lita (OMG! That is SO going to be my new name for her!), however, I won't throw a fit about it either. THIS SONG, however, I can guarantee you if you play this one in front of me there WILL be a fit. I hated this piece of shit from day one. I mean, "your body is a wonderland?" What kind of cheesy compliment is that? This song is just stupid, and the fact that VH1 and my local Hot AC station here in Florida overplayed the crap out of this sure did not help matters. As I stated earlier, this tool has too more overplayed pieces of crap left on the list.

25. Whack Eyed Peas - Imma Be A Meth-Addicted Whore (2010)
I was thinking about this not that long ago. When artists that we don't like are so successful, of course we'd be like, "Why are they doing so well? Why aren't they flopping?!" Of course we're going to question that if we don't like the artist. But as much as I dislike the Whack Eyed Peas, I want to be serious about this for a minute here. I know not everyone feels this way, but the majority of people that I know absolutely hate the direction the WEP are going in. Their new album, The Beginning, and lead single which appeared earlier on the list, "The Time (Dirty Bit)", also got negative reviews. My question is, if so many people can't stand their newer material, how come they are so huge? Why are they doing so well? I'm not even saying that to be a bitch for once. "The Time" didn't even take off immediately, if I recall. Is it Payola? Did Fuglie blow the record companies or radio DJ's like the cheap, meth-addicted whore that she is? I especially find it mind-boggling in the case of this song. I know this wasn't on The Beginning, but this is seriously one of the laziest, most annoying, most half-assed songs I have ever heard, and it is my second least favorite song of 2010.

24. Sam Harris – Sugar Don't Suck (Oh Wait, I Already Do!) (1984)
Actual title is "Sugar Don't Bite". Back when XM was awesome and had no association with Shitius, I mean Sirius, whatsoever, they had an awesome 80's channel called 80's On 8. Halfway through every hour (unless they were airing American Top 40, of course), they showcased an "80's Wannabe", which was basically a really obscure song from the 80's. One night I was listening to this station, minding my own busines. Then they played this song as the 80's Wannabe and boy was I in for some ear torture. This dude has one of, if not, the WORST falsetto voice I have EVER heard! It BAFFLES me how this dude got a record deal! I would also like to add that this is actually the highest 80's song on the list, which means two things: #1) There are three songs from the new decade left (one of them is the next song at #23, one 90's song left, and everything else is from the 2000's, and #2) "Sugar Don't Bite" is, in my opinion, the worst song of the 80's. Yup, even worse than Prince and George Michael. Who would've thought? There's actually a hilarious video of Beavis & Butthead making fun of this dude's version of "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" (Sam Harris doing THAT song? What has the world come to?) that I would like to share with you guys.



23. Lil' Payne featuring Jimmy Brooks – Right Above Sucking (2011)
Drake, go back to being Jimmy Brooks on Degrassi. Lil' Wayne, go back to giving me fries at McDonald's. That is all.

22. Matisyahu – King With A Crap Song (2006)
I'm sorry, I'm just not a reggae person. I remember when I was broadcasting a regular show on Variety FM in either November or December of 2005, someone requested this song. It was brand new and I've never heard it before. It was a request, so I played it. BOY WAS I IN FOR SOME TORTURE. What especially sucks is that I actually think I sat through the entire thing. I should've just did what I did with the Singing Nun and Band Aid 20 and interrupted it in the middle of the song. On a side note, yes Band Aid 20 missed the list. For those who don't know/remember that story, I played Band Aid 20 on VFM one morning and abruptly shut it off after about a minute because I thought it sucked, and played "To The Moon & Back" by Savage Garden instead. But yeah, this song blows, and the fact that I never heard from this flop again is rather AWESOME.

21. Slutley Skankrus – The Crap (2009)
Actual title is "The Climb". Well, first of all, this photo sums up how I feel about Miley Cyrus, and Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, and Fergie too for that matter. Also Lindsay Lohan although she isn't on this list.



Second of all, like "Stars Are Blind", this song would be way better if someone with talent sang it. I heard this song for the first time in some local store here in Florida, I don't remember the name of it. But I saw a pretty pink summer dress there that I really liked and I wanted to try it on. While I was in the fitting room this song came on and I was DISGUSTED by how awful the vocals were. I had no idea what it was until the awful chorus began with her going, "IT'S THE CLIIMMBBBBB!!!1111" I rushed out of the dressing room, didn't buy the dress, and left the store in order to save the lives of my poorly abused ears. That dress may have been cute, but your store is not worthy of my money if you play crap like this song. Her voice is so bad. Seriously this whore is like the female equivalent of J.D. Fortune to me, THAT'S how bad she is. I just hope Can't Be Tamed is this skank's last album. Ordinarily this is the part where I would post embarrassing photos of her, but I don't want to get banned for child porn so I'm not going to do that. However, what the f**k is this?



An Iron Maiden shirt? Are you KIDDING me? Miley, you will never be metal. You are about as metal as Pat Boone. Now please never wear that shirt again because Iron Maiden shirts are only supposed to be worn by awesomeheads, which you are not.

16. Kim Kardashian is famous for getting pissed on. This guy used to be famous for his voice, and now he's famous for being the pisser! The year on this one is 2003. (It's not Ray J )
17. An album track from... Lady Gaga?!
18. Overplayed political song from 2006.
19. Overplayed boring crap from 2008; same artist as #18.
20. A payne + A pain = One BIG headache pain for me! From 2008.

[impractiCole]

16. R Kelly - Ignition
17. Lady GaGa - Speechless
18. P!nk - Dear Mr President
19. P!nk - Sober
20. Lil Wayne - Got Money f/ T-Pain

[kevinkdc]

I think it's speachless. Horrible song !!

[Billy Uranus]

Speechless is awesome. But then again, I'd say the same thing about "Pretty Vegas". These pictures are cracking me up though. ;D I actually didn't think those John Mayer and Black Eyed Peas songs were that bad, though.

For the record, Kim Kardashian is only gorgeous from the neck down.

[JessiePie]

impracticable - #20 is correct, #16 is the right artist and from the same album but wrong song. I've never heard "Speechless" from Gaga, I don't even know what album that's on. The song at #17 is from The Fame Monster.

KP - PRETTY VEGAS IS EVIL. And what do you mean from the neck down? You don't like her face?

[impractiCole]

^ what about 18 and 19? are those correct??

17. Lady GaGa - Monster

[JessiePie]

No, "Raise Your Glass" was Pink's highest appearance. I didn't mind "Sober" and "Dear Mr. President". I'll give you a hint about 18 and 19 - this artist had a song in the previous set.

It's not "Monster" by the way, don't know that one.

[Billy Uranus]

May 18, 2011 15:00:43 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

KP - PRETTY VEGAS IS EVIL. And what do you mean from the neck down? You don't like her face?

If I had a personal chart in early 2006, it would have surely been a #1 hit for me.

And yeah, I'm not a fan of Kim K's face. Or her personality. Or her TV shows. But her body and Super Bowl commercials are fine by me.

[JessiePie]

20. Lil' Payne featuring T-Pain – Don't Got Money (2008)
Lil' Wayne and T-Pain? I'm sorry but that's just a recipe for disaster! At least I kind of don't mind Drake, but this is just awful. "Weezy", which by the way is an extremely stupid nickname, has two more songs left.

19. John Mayer – (Please Don't) Say (Anything And Just Retire You Boring Douchebag) (2008)
Say what you need to say? What I need to say is – SHUT THE f**k UP JOHN MAYER! This song was boring to begin with but overplay just made things worse. Unless you'd consider "I Gotta Feeling" by the Whack Eyed Peas a ballad, which I personally wouldn't, this is to me the worst ballad of all-time.

18. John Mayer – Waiting On This Song To Stop Being Played (2006)
I don't hate songs for their political lyrics. I really don't care about that. "World Wide Suicide" by Pearl Jam was one of the biggest hits on my chart. So with that said, when I first heard this song I didn't know it was anything political. When I first heard this song I just really hated it. Your typical overplayed, overrated, Hot AC crap from the floppy douchebag that is John Mayer. Also, this is his highest song on the list.

17. Tranny Gaga – (My) Teeth (Make Me Look Like A Tranny) (2009)
Yes, a Lady Gaga album track from her 2009 album, The Fame Monster, appears on the list. I do not own this album. In fact, I don't own any albums from this tranny. However, this goes back to all my stories about hearing bad music at the mall. One of my favorite clothing stores, Bebe, was playing this song. I had no idea who it was but I kind of suspected it was Gaga since the vocals sounded like her. This is seriously one of the dumbest, most annoying songs I have ever heard. I mean, why the hell does she want me to show her my teeth? Not to mention, why does she have to ask 837 times in this damn song?! FLOP!

16. R. Smelly – Thoia Thoing (No, I'm Not Even Going To Bother Messing With That Title) (2003)
His only appearance on the list, and it's all the way at #16! I remember when this one first came out. I saw it debut in the Billboard charts and thought it was one of the dumbest song titles I have ever heard. Then shortly after that I heard it through... I think MTV but I'm not sure. And I HATED IT. What the hell is that chorus??? It's not just annoying, it's CREEPY. Yes, that is exactly what this song is. CREEPY. I really hope I don't ever have to hear this one ever again because everything about this song freaks me out. The title, the music, the "thoia thoing" chorus, EVERYTHING.

11. HUGE hit in 2009 for this shitty band. One of their members is also a huge whore.
12. Same group as #11; this song is from 2010. The second to last song of the new decade to appear on the list.
13. Lil' Wayne song from 2008.
14. #1 pop hit from late 2009.
15. Last Aaron Carter song to make the list; from 2001.

[- `J0EL™]

13. Lollipop

[Billy Uranus]

May 19, 2011 11:41:53 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

20. Lil' Payne featuring T-Pain – Don't Got Money (2008)
Lil' Wayne and T-Pain? I'm sorry but that's just a recipe for disaster! At least I kind of don't mind Drake, but this is just awful. "Weezy", which by the way is an extremely stupid nickname, has two more songs left.

This is a great choice to kick off your top 20. I remember hating this song back in 2008.

May 19, 2011 11:41:53 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

19. John Mayer – (Please Don't) Say (Anything And Just Retire You Boring Douchebag) (2008)
Say what you need to say? What I need to say is – SHUT THE F*** UP JOHN MAYER! This song was boring to begin with but overplay just made things worse. Unless you'd consider "I Gotta Feeling" by the Whack Eyed Peas a ballad, which I personally wouldn't, this is to me the worst ballad of all-time.

I don't hate it, but I feel like this is where John Mayer really started to go downhill.

May 19, 2011 11:41:53 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

18. John Mayer – Waiting On This Song To Stop Being Played (2006)
I don't hate songs for their political lyrics. I really don't care about that. "World Wide Suicide" by Pearl Jam was one of the biggest hits on my chart. So with that said, when I first heard this song I didn't know it was anything political. When I first heard this song I just really hated it. Your typical overplayed, overrated, Hot AC crap from the floppy douchebag that is John Mayer. Also, this is his highest song on the list.

Awww, I love this song! One of his best songs ever...although like you, I didn't notice that it was political at first.

May 19, 2011 11:41:53 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

16. R. Smelly – Thoia Thoing (No, I'm Not Even Going To Bother Messing With That Title) (2003)
His only appearance on the list, and it's all the way at #16! I remember when this one first came out. I saw it debut in the Billboard charts and thought it was one of the dumbest song titles I have ever heard. Then shortly after that I heard it through... I think MTV but I'm not sure. And I HATED IT. What the hell is that chorus??? It's not just annoying, it's CREEPY. Yes, that is exactly what this song is. CREEPY. I really hope I don't ever have to hear this one ever again because everything about this song freaks me out. The title, the music, the "thoia thoing" chorus, EVERYTHING.

I don't like this, but I don't like anything from this bastard. He's just a creepy, creepy dude.

May 19, 2011 11:41:53 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

11. HUGE hit in 2009 for this s**tty band. One of their members is also a huge whore.
12. Same group as #11; this song is from 2010. The second to last song of the new decade to appear on the list.
13. Lil' Wayne song from 2008.
14. #1 pop hit from late 2009.
15. Last Aaron Carter song to make the list; from 2001.

11. Black Eyed Peas - I Gotta Feeling
12. Black Eyed Peas - Rock That Body
13. Lil Wayne - A Milli
14. Iyaz - Replay
15. Aaron Carter - Oh Aaron!

[JessiePie]

KP, all of those are right Joel, "Lollipop" is still to come. Before I continue though, I would like to give honorable mentions to four awful songs that I completely forgot about until this very second, and would have made the list if I remembered about their unfortunate existence - "Up, Up, Up" by Rose Falcon (I can't guarantee this would've made the list though but it at least would have made the bottom 50 that I posted in the beginning of the thread), "Girls" by Sugababes, "Barracuda" by Fuglie, I mean, Fergie, and "Teach Me How To Dougie" by Cali Swag District.

15. Aaron Carter – Oh Aaron (You're A Tool) (2001)
Dream Street. Jesse McCartney solo. Play. Jump 5. No Secrets. Myra. Atomic Kitten. Kaci. Brooke Allison. Justin Bieber. Jonas Brothers. A*Teens. Angela Via. Steps. Krystal Harris. Lindsey Pagano. Nobody's Angel. What do all these artists who you probably forgot about until now have in common? They're all less cheesy than this F***ING PIECE OF s**t SONG. One of the verses in this song is a phone call between Aaron and Nick, asking Nick for 1,000 extra tickets to a Backstreet Boys concert to impress a girl. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I'm so glad Nick told Aaron it was his own problem. I would have been way more harsh though.

14. Iyaz – (I'm Begging You, Please Don't) Replay (This Crap) (2009)
This just goes to show how out of touch I've been. This went to #1 in late 2009 and I first heard this in Spring 2010. It doesn't matter when I first heard this though because either way it would've gotten the same reaction from me - This blows BIG TIME. First of all, Iyaz? What the hell kind of name is that? This song is seriously autotuned to death. SO glad he's a one hit wonder and hopefully it stays that way.

13. Lil' Payne – A Milli (2008)
You know, it's one thing that now everyone is referring to fifty cents as "fifty cent", because apparently having fifty cents on you isn't plural anymore. But now thanks to this piece of crap song, I bet everyone is going to refer to a million as "a milli" now. Fortunately, I have yet to overhear anyone say this, but if anyone else has, please let me know since I want to know if I'm right or not.

12. Whack Eyed Peas – (Please Don't) Rock That Body (Because You're Fuglie And You're A Whore) (2010)
It's songs like this that make me miss the days of when I liked dance music, which were also the days when it wasn't the "in" thing and actually had substance. The chorus to this song in particular SCREAMS headache. Ordinarily I'd insult Fuglie some more but I'm going to save that for the next song which just VERY barely missed the top 10...

11. Whack Eyed Peas – I Gotta Feeling (That This Song Is Really s**tty) (2009)
Their highest appearance on the list. When I say that this VERY barely missed the top 10, I really do mean VERY barely. I kept switching this and the #10 song constantly, but I decided that this will be #11. If I had a dollar for every time Will.I.Am.s**t said, "I gotta feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night" in this song, I'd be a millionaire. OH WAIT NO I'm sorry. I'd be ~a milli~. Apparently this was like a monster hit in the summer of 2009 but I fortunately had no idea about this since I wasn't following pop music or the charts at all back then, for the most part. I just didn't get anything about this song. Even the music to it wasn't that great to me. And of course, WHAT A SURPRISE! Fuglie looked like a total whore in the video! Don't get me wrong, lingerie is hot, just not on him her. I'm sure everyone who has been reading these silly commentaries has been wondering why I have been hating on that meth-addicted tranny so much, especially because I liked their solo album and they even had a few big hits on my chart. Well, the truth is, it's a long story. Maybe a year from now I'll get over my newfound hatred for them like I did with Kelly Clarkson back in 2007 and Britney Spears/Jessica Simpson back in 2006, but who knows? By the way, here's another embarrassing photo of this low class, trashy, meth-addicted skank who apparently doesn't know what a razor is.

[Billy Uranus]

LOL, that's so harsh! ;D But both of those BEP songs are really bad, especially "I Gotta Feeling". I also couldn't agree more with "A Milli" as that song had perhaps the most obnoxious chorus of anything I have ever heard....other than "Replay" by Iyaz. I'm being serious when I say that is the WORST piece of monkey crap that I have ever listened to.

I actually have the Oh! Aaron CD right here in my room. The phone call between him and Nick is hilarious, in a bad way. I can't believe I got all those guesses right...I'm supposed to be bad at them!

[A Strange Boy]

I have to say I love both "Stars are Blind" (and its parent album!) & "Turn It Up" (I really love dead-eye blank robotic R&B).

[JessiePie]

TOP 10 TIME! I'm sick of doing commentaries so I'm just going to reveal the rest of the list now…

10. Hole – Celebrity Skin
9. Garbage – I Think I'm Paranoid
8. Nirvana – Smells Like Teen Spirit
7. Pearl Jam – Jeremy
6. Tori Amos – Sleeps With Butterflies
5. Oasis – Wonderwall
4. Alanis Morissette – Eight Easy Steps
3. Heart - Never
2. Pat Benatar – Love Is A Battlefield
1. Lita Ford – Kiss Me Deadly

THERE'S YOUR LIST! Goodbye.






























































































































LMAO, I know it's more than obvious, but yes I was just kidding. Especially considering that those are ten of my favorite songs ever. Here's the real #10!


10. Las Ketchup - That Ketchup Crap (2002)
Three whores singing about ketchup? Are you serious? Next I suppose whenever Girls Aloud come back, their comeback single will be about mustard. Or maybe The Saturdays will do a song about mayonnaise! Since, you know, those are SUCH brilliant lyrical themes for songs. This is one of the dumbest songs I have ever heard. In fact I think my IQ dropped a bit after I heard this.

[A Strange Boy]

When I saw "Celebrity Skin" there I was like . One of the best albums ever.

[A Strange Boy]

To be honest, most of Xenomania's post-2005 work has lyrics as bad, if not worse than "Las Ketchup".

[Billy Uranus]

May 21, 2011 15:57:57 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

TOP 10 TIME! I'm sick of doing commentaries so I'm just going to reveal the rest of the list now…

8. Nirvana – Smells Like Teen Spirit
7. Pearl Jam – Jeremy
5. Oasis – Wonderwall
2. Pat Benatar – Love Is A Battlefield

This could start a list of the most overrated songs of all-time...

But I was kinda shocked. I'll admit it; you fooled me big time. ;D

[JessiePie]

May 21, 2011 16:42:35 GMT -5 A Strange Boy said:

When I saw "Celebrity Skin" there I was like . One of the best albums ever.

OMG ARE WE TWINS?!

THAT ALBUM IS AMAZING ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITES <3

[JessiePie]

Oh, and "Smells Like Teen Spirit", "Jeremy", "Wonderwall", and "Love Is A Battlefield" are NOT OVERRATED. GOD.

[JessiePie]

9. Eminem - Career Suicide (2005)
Generally, I like Eminem. Sure he's released some songs I didn't like such as "Just Lose It" and "We Made You", but for the most part I don't mind him. However, when I first heard this crap back in 2005 when it debuted on the U.K. charts, my IQ started dropping even more than it did when I first heard "The Ketchup Song". At one point in this song he raps about jerking off to a Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen movie (one of them from when they were older don't worry )... you never saw an ass like theirs? Of course you didn't because they're nonexistent! I used to love MK&A but now they look so scarily thin. But anyway, I always referred to this song as career suicide. Notice that ever since this song came out, none of his songs did very well until "Not Afraid" came out. I'm glad he was able to redeem himself and let's keep it that way.

[Billy Uranus]

I never thought about it that literally but I guess you're right. He was singing about all these assless women in a song called ASS like that...just stupid imo. Not a bad choice for the top 10. While I don't hate this song, I definitely resent it for the fact that this was where he started to use that putrid accent on a regular basis.

I don't like "Not Afraid" either though. It was a big pile of boring, but that's what Eminem is nowadays. Em is the kind of guy that has to be cheated on/lied to/spit on/beat up to write good music. The better his life is going...the shittier his music tends to be.

May 22, 2011 15:56:39 GMT -5 JessiePie said:

Oh, and "Smells Like Teen Spirit", "Jeremy", "Wonderwall", and "Love Is A Battlefield" are NOT OVERRATED. GOD.

Well if that's the case, then "About a Girl," "State Of Love & Trust" and "Don't Look Back In Anger" are all underrated.